The Father The Son and The Flame
by kittplopter
Summary: Mustang returns from Ishvals humanitarian efforts to find out why Ed quit the military whilst he was gone.
1. Chapter 1

**Quick blurb! I know I haven't been back in a while I'm sorry I've been working on "you got me a dog?" aswell but been busy with a new job. I have wanted to do this fanfiction for a while now, I'd love to know what people think, it's probably gonna be short. But also if you think it's worth while to continue?**

 **WARNINGS FOR ANGST/FLUFF AND MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH. Serious tho there's a hell of a lot of fluff:P**

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General Mustang took a grateful, deep breath of fresh, clean air as soon as he stepped onto the quiet platform and off the train. He had been stuck on that warm, musty train for three days since leaving Central and was eager to disembark, if only to stretch his sore legs and spine. It was early morning, so hardly anyone else was around. Not like their would be many at the Resembool station at any time of day. It had just been raining, and even though Roy disliked the rain, it was refreshing compared to where he had been for the last three years. 'This really is paradise compared to Ishval' he thought, a bitter smile forming on the old war dog's face.

After becoming General of the Amestrian army, (and to the grief of his higher ups, which he greatly enjoyed) Roy took it on himself to do some hands on humanitarian work in Ishval.

It was about time he made some penance for the sins he had committed. Though Roy knew nothing would ever truly make up for the lives he had taken. That said, it wasn't easy gaining their trust to even let him pick up a shovel. But the Ishvalans where a peaceful people, and eventually let him help.

Among the volunteers, Roy's old, faithful team had joined him whilst he labored. Pride brimmed through his very being when his team announced definitively that they would follow their General wherever they needed him. Three years later, and he felt they had made a significant difference, in a good way for once, for the people of Ishbal. Now it was time to return, and make a difference from behind a desk once again. Though Roy wasn't sure if he preferred paperwork, or back breaking labor.

Breaking him out of his day dream and stepping down off the train gracefully behind him and not nearly as sore and hunched over as Roy had been, his second in command, Colonel Hawkeye, joined him on the platform.

"Sir, you need to move, you're blocking other passengers getting off."

"Huh?" Registering what she said and stepping aside, he gave Riza a small, embarrassed grin. "Sorry, was just in my own world, tired from the journey" He went to take his bag, bending down and letting out a small, unintentional whine when his back made an audible cracking sound and his spine shot with a hot flame of pain. Old, deep, painful scars from his battle with Bradley that never truly healed. They made him feel oh so very old. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Riza about to put out her hands to offer to take his bag, but then back away again, taking her own instead. Probably trying to save what little face her General had recently.

He hated the thought of Riza's pitying gaze, increasingly annoyed at how gentle she was being with him lately.

Embarrassed at his veteran whine he stood up straight, another loud crack ensuing, causing him to grimace. Fighting back from hissing in pain, he began to walk with a fake prowess, though the limp didn't help it look convincing. "God I'm only 36, making those kind of noises should only reserved for people 60 plus! " He thought to himself frustratedly. Ishval had been tough on Roy with his injuries, and he felt the toll especially in the last few months. His body had grown weaker.

Following loyally beside Roy, matching his slower speed, Riza smiled at him with warm concern, a small knowing look in her eyes. She wanted to do everything to make him comfortable, but knowing how proud a man her superior was, sometimes it was better to ignore his pain.

"You're nervous arn't you, to see Ed?" She said bluntly but with a fond and teasing tone.

She saw Roy stiffen slightly, but then relax just as quickly, he nodded slowly, yes he was nervous to see Ed again. It had been three years, the boy had quit the army as soon as Roy had gone to Ishval, never really explaining why. He was concerned for the boy, well young man now. Ed suffered greatly from depression after the war. It was as if he'd been running on adrenaline for his entire youth, and when all was said and done, it had caught up to the him like a slam in the chest. When Roy had heard Ed had quit and gone back home, he had only been in Ishval three days. Contacting him had been pretty difficult, given the only phone was miles from base camp, but the only explanation Ed had given at the time was a numb sounding 'I have more important things to focus on now Mustang'. That was when Roy decided, that as soon as he got back to Central and sorted out his office, he was to take the train straight to Resembool. The kid didn't know he was coming, but how could he be angry? Roy smirked 'That's a stupid thing to ask...Ed got angry at everything' But really, his motifs were slightly selfish.

Roy wanted Ed back on his team.

If he was ever going to rise to the top and make true changes, he had to have Fullmetal. Roy's team was hand picked, trustworthy, and loyal. Losing one of them was something he wanted to make absolutely sure was allowed to happen. If Ed was just moping around, well then it was time to slap some sense into the kid. And Roy was the one to do it. He grinned, suddenly feeling a little more encouraged by his self pep talk and sped up, down the road to the nearest, and only taxi with Riza catching up, giving him an odd disapproving look at how fast he was suddenly trotting. "Sir, don't hurt your leg…"

"Yeah yeah" Roy flapped his hand in a shooing motion rudely, Riza's only response being an eye roll. Roy gave her a cheeky grin, only to turn back around and see an old couple getting into the only taxi."Wait! No! That's our Taxi dammit!" Roy shouted, limping ungraciously faster. The old couple did not hear the cries and the taxi sped off. Leaving the two soldiers in it's dusty cloud of exhaust fumes.

"Ah shit…."

"Well just wait for it to come back Sir, it's a small town, it shouldn't be long." Though Riza highly doubted her superior would just sit down and rest for an hour.

"I've been waiting for three days on that train, I'm tired, I'm sore..." Riza blinked at that, it was rare Roy admitted he was in pain. "...and I just want to get this over with, let's find a shop and ask them would anyone give us a lift" Riza nodded, not wanting to bother with arguing, she was also tired, even if she didn't show it. They trodded along a rough, country road, never meeting anyone until they reached a small village. The entire place was quiet except for the occasional cyclist or horse and cart. Nothing about it seemed even in this century. Suddenly, Roy craved the bustling streets of Central, where he could get his pick of ten different bars on one street. This place was so...boring.

They walked until they found a small newsagents that sold all sorts of groceries, tid bits and tools. Stepping into it, the bell above the door chimed a pleasant introduction for the two weary soldiers. The shop itself was bigger on the inside. Several isles stacked up to the top with all sorts of wares. The large, burly woman behind the desk was flipping through a magazine, hand boredly placed on her cheek, lifting only her eyes to greet the two suspicious looking soldiers who just entered her shop.

"G'mornin…how can I help you?" She asked, with a small air of caution to her voice.

But before Roy could explain their situation, a loud crash verberated from the corner of the shop. A small squeal followed the crash with a small, delicate gasp from behind the aisle as a few tin cans rolled towards Roy's feet.

"FINN!" The burly woman shouted sharply at the aisle. "You know you arn't supposed to wander in here without your Daddy!" She sighed and rubbed her eyes, turning to her two customers. Roy didn't say anything, taking a small unconscious step back. "That boy, I swear he is so damn accident prone and clumsy. Always wandering off from his parents! And he always ends up in here! Staring at the metal tools no less! The kids facinated, like mother like son I guess. A constant daydreamer!...Well?!" Turning again to the pile of tin cans. "Come out now here boy and wait for your Daddy, he's probably having a stroke trying to look for you again!". Both Roy and Riza fixed their eyes on the small little figure peeking out from behind the shelving. Slowly the little boy came out, eyeing the two strangers warily.

That's when Roy's eyes widened as he took in what he saw.

The little child couldn't of been more than three. His eyes were a beautifully, glistening shade of gold, twinkling in the low light of the shop. His hair, a golden mop, flowed down to his shoulders. He was so cherub like, a little angel, but what really caught Roy's attention was the look he was getting off the golden boy. His eyes were smart, intense and looked far wiser than beyond his years. Roy could feel the scrutinizing glare of the child, and would not admit, he shifted unconsciously on his feet as if being interrogated.

Before Roy could even say it, Riza had beat him to it.

"He looks just like Edward…" she said quietly.

Roy nodded, only able to make a small grunt as the boy watched him, fascinated but not moving from his gaze.

"Come're Finn! You can sit on the counter while we wait." She slapped the counter top with a smile, gesturing for Finn to come over.

Warily deciding he wasn't in any trouble, Finn smiled and ran out from behind the aisle, taking a wide berth of Roy and Riza, scanning them with a small confused look. He scrambled onto the woman's leg and she hoisted him strongly up onto the counter. He sat there, now level with Roy's torso, staring at all his badges adorning the generals chest.

"Now!" The woman exclaimed. "What can I get for ya two soldiers?"

Riza began explaining that they needed to hire a car, or hitch hike there way to a friends house. Chatting away in a pleasant manner that she had reserved for normal folk.

Roy on the other hand was still staring at the mini Edward. 'He's like an extra pip squeeked, Pip squeek!' Roy thought humorously. The boy staring intensely at Roy's chest again, fascinated by his medals.

"They're pretty cool, arnt they?" Roy smirked, raising an eyebrow, trying to seem less intimidating to the kid. The kid looked up at him, not saying a word, but began to smile and nodded enthusiastically in agreement.

Roy took one of the fancier medals in his hands and took it off, handing it to the boy who's eyes only widened even more, taking an inward breathe he slowly took the medal and began examining it furiously. Taking a tooth to it lightly, then rubbing it with his hands.

Roy smiled, genuinely enjoying seeing how this simple thing could make this kid so happy. The passion he showed reminding him far too much of how Fullmetal would look when explaining anything about metals and minerals.

Suddenly, there was a small flash of light coming from the boys hands, all parties in the room faced him, wide eyed. When the flash subsided, Roy saw, that now in the boys hands, his medal has transformed into a small, golden wrench.

Everyone stood there, motionless, while Finn didn't even seem to care about his dumbfounded audience and continued to fiddle with the once medal.

Roy shook himself out of his surprise, it wasn't that odd for someone so young to use alchemy…..without a transmutation circle….so easily…."H...how did you" Roy began to say, but then was interrupted by the door of the shop slamming open, hitting the wall, the bell falling off and someone panting breathlessly. The shopkeeper leaned back and grinned, not really trying to hide her laughter. Roy noticed Finns smile broaden when he saw the man at the door.

"You need to start checking here first Mr. Elric!" The woman chided. Roy couldn't believe his eyes. There stood the twenty two year old Edward Elric, panting and looking crazily worried. He was about to call out for the young man but then Edward began to stomp forward angrily.

Ed ignored her and the two other patrons, only having eyes for the little golden haired boy on the counter. Panting and incredibly out of breath, looking like he was about to be sick from terror alone.

"Oh my god Finn! I have been looking everywhere for you! I told you to not wander off anymore! Your mother is gonna kill me if she finds out I lost you again this week. Goddammit! You've had me so sick with worry."

Stomping by the two other occupants of the room, looking like a bull in a china shop, ready to charge, he stepped in front of the small boy. Finn looked up at his father's scowl, not believing a word of the anger and then reached his arms in a demanding 'pick me up' fashion. Ignoring all of Edwards words as if this parade of anger bored him.

Immediately Roy saw Edwards eyes soften and his tight lipped face now soften into a loving sulk.

In a more quiet tone Ed sighed and continued "Just because I'm a push over doesn't mean mom is gonna be." He hiked the small boy up in his arms, Finn letting out a small giggle as Ed smiled softly, the kindness in his eyes that had only ever been seen reserved for Alphonse, now full of love for the little kid he held so delicately.

Riza finally took the initiative and cleared her throat loudly enough for Edward and his son to look over. "Hello Edward, it's good to see you again." she said warmly, smiling at Finn as he clinged to his father's chest. It was hard not to at the site she just beheld. Something primal in her looked at them and she was instantly feeling homely.

Immediately Ed's eyes widened, his body stiffened as Finn turned to him, wondering at his daddy's sudden change of mood. He didn't say anything for a bit but then

"...Riza?..." Then suddenly noticing the dark haired man in the corner. "M-Mustang!? What are you doing here?!"

The whole experience was just so...other worldly to Roy. 'Fullmetal had a son. A son! He was atleast three? So that means'… he remembered back "'I have more important things to focus on now Mustang….'" Was this the reason he quit?'

Riza elbowed her superior in the side, knocking some sense into him to respond. "Oh uh, yes….Hey Fullmetal, it's been a while" trying to sound light but failing miserably. It was pretty obvious both men were awkward as hell right now. Riza rolled her eyes and stepped forward towards Ed. "Ed is this your son? He's gorgeous! I cannot believe this!" Ed took his wide eyes off of Mustang for the moment as Riza approached Finn. His expression softened as he faced her, "Y-yeah, he is. This is Finn." As Riza bent down to say hello to Finn properly, Ed began to blush faintly, glancing at Mustang to see any response, but getting nothing but a glazed over stare. He held Finn instinctively firmer, feeling protective as he was stared down by the older man.

Realizing he was not prepared for this at all, Ed started. Turning to leave. "Uh s-sorry Riza, I'm late, I have to go back to Winry, she's not feeling too well at the moment and I promised I'd be back by noon." He babbled and began walking briskly towards the door, Finn in arms still looking confused over the sudden change of mood, clasping onto the small gold wrench.

"Alright…" Riza obviously saw the panic in his face so was not going to pressure him to stay. "Ed, can we meet up tomorrow?"

He stood at the door. "Sorry Fran, about the bell, I'll fix it when I come back." And with that, he was gone.

Riza stood there, half tempted to go after him, but then realized her annoyance laid elsewhere. She swiftly turned around to face her silent superior and squared up to his chest. Only now did Roy take notice of her, and she was not happy.

A small shiver of cold sweat slithered down his neck. Oh, she was not happy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Soooo second chapter!:) it's longer, kinda angsty, hope you like;u; Also I wanted to state that in my fanfiction Ed still has his Alchemy. I'll edit that at the start too...I just don't like an fma story without it! So I guess AU? IDK and don't worry I'll be explaining why Finn can use it too among other things next chapter: Enjoy!**

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Ed wasn't exactly the hardest person to read. A lot of his emotions laid bare for anyone who took a minute to study him. But even so, Finn was a very emotionally intelligent little boy and watching his daddy swiftly get as far away from that shop as he possibly could, wondered what made him so upset about that man. He seemed friendly enough, he gave him this cool medal, that Finn had stuffed into his sleeve secretly. How could someone who gave him a medal be a bad man? No, he was a good man.

Finn frowned, nodded and blew a convicted breathe from his nose. Yeah, he liked the man and the nice lady in Fran's shop.

Edward continued down the tree laden country lane, his mouth stretched thinly from stress. It would take awhile to get back home now after his frantic escapades around the village, which only worried him more. He let out an exasperated sigh,"Of all the people to meet I had to stumble into that basta-" he glanced down to see Finn staring back with his bright golden eyes, hanging on his every word. "-eh….man." Usually he was better at controlling his swearing around his son, usually. But that damn flame headed idiot just drew it out of him. _'Why did it have to be now, why couldn't it have been three months ago that he decided on his stupid surprise visit? That bozo has the worst fucking timing…'_

His stomach formed several knots as he traversed a small, muddy field. _'No, not now, I'll just tell them to go home, I'm too busy right now. Yeah. I'll... I'll tell them I'm researching importing things or something…'_

Finn turned to look up at his daddy, tapping him on the cheek with his small index finger. Ed looked down at the boy, distracting him from his thoughts. The little boy then took his left hand, and pointed to Ed's chest. Then in the same motion, put his thumb and index finger together, with his remaining little fingers slightly splayed, tilting his head inquisitively.

Ed couldn't help but stop, the concern in his son's eyes for him felt so undeserving. He smiled, trying to dismiss any bad thoughts. The fact that his child was wondering if he was okay, meant Ed wasn't exactly hiding his concerns well enough, which only shamed him more.

"Yes Finn" embracing the little boy more and trying to force a smile. "I'm okay, you don't have to worry about me. Let's get home and get something to eat." Ed felt Finn relax a little in his arms. He hated that he made his own three year old son worry. That wasn't what a father was supposed to do. At Least he thought so. Ed was also around three when he learnt what it meant to be stressed over one's parents.

He shifted Finn in his arms, hoisting him so the boy could lean his head against his neck, and continued walking.

Finn wrapped his arm around the front of Ed's shoulder and let out a small breathy yawn. His eyes drawing heavy.

Ed glanced down at the small boy practically hiding underneath his chin. Concern washed over him as he wondered just how tired Finn was. Neither of them were getting much sleep lately, Finn was a light sleeper, so every time Ed got up ( no matter how quiet he tried to be) to take care of Winry, he joined him in wandering around the house at all hours. Pottering beside him cutely, barely making any noise, curiously watching. Ed wouldn't admit it, but having his little shadow follow him everywhere made the long nights slightly more bearable . When he'd be making food or cleaning up the mechanics lab, the occasional grip of a tiny hand onto his leg made his heart swell. He had come to understand just how Hughes had felt about Elisa. His son was just so damn adorable.

At first, Ed had been adamant he go back to sleep, but soon gave up like the push over he was. If Finn looked up at him with those glistening iris's, well then he was butter in his son's hands. It wasn't like he spoiled the child, much.

Ed realized by the age of three, Finn was already finding ways to fool people around him. Including Ed. Transmuting stair cases to be just that tiny bit higher, or increasing the density of a pillow so that the person, aka Ed, would flop down wearily only to be met by a kiss of what felt like concrete feathers. That had hurt...

Ed let out an exhausted sigh. He knew his boy was the definition of 'bold'. At Least that's what the villagers gossiped. _'Well they can go fuck themselves_ ' Ed grumbled. But as much as he was played for a fool, he was always incredibly impressed. Which in turn probably made his son's behavior worse.

Ed realized early on though, that his mischief was always quelled around his mother. There was no bad behavior, just a polite little golden boy who clung onto her leg while she stood cooking, or working in the mechanics studio. Ed had come to the conclusion that it wasn't because Winry was strict, but rather that Finn subconsciously knew his mother was unwell. His gentleness shone through around her. ' _Could a child know his mother was going to_ -'

Clenching his eyes closed for a moment Ed dispelled those morbid thoughts.

"How can I look after both of you...when I can't even keep you in my sights?" Shifting his mood to a more joking manor. He spoke quietly, not expecting an answer from his child.

Finn breathed out a sigh as if he was being disturbed by his father's ramblings, and closed his eyes once again.

Ed walked for another hour before reaching the bottom of the hill where his wife's house stood. His metal leg hurt, automail slightly squeaking on its hinges as he began the slow ascent upwards. He had refused to have it serviced lately to Winry's annoyance, but he saw how much her regular jobs would take from her, so declined every time, claiming it didn't feel as bad as it looked. It hadn't gotten too bad just yet, but the minor squeaks and stiffness were beginning to take their toll. Damn, he wished he hadn't taken so long in town.

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"Riza! Fullmetal has had a kid for three years, and never informed us. Can't I atleast be a little mad by this?"

Riza didn't move, obviously not falling for his woe is me act, arms crossed staring down at him as he sat on the side of his creaky bed in their dinky room.

Thanks to Fran, they had found a small motel just a few streets over with a vacant room. It was far from even a one star, but garish furniture aside, it had agreeable beds, which Roy was aching to lie down on.

But before he could truly relax, he had to deal with the Hawkeye glare.

"You couldn't even be friendly to him General…you could tell how awkward he felt." Roy grimaced. Riza only used his title in work, or when she was really pissed at him.

Well he wasn't giving in that easily. Glaring back at his subordinate he practically pouted like a stubborn child. Riza cocked her head sideways, awaiting his reply.

Then, realizing he didn't really have a leg to stand on, he let out an exasperated sigh, flopping back onto the bed and rubbing in between his eyes. Riza raised her eyebrow, bemused by his lack of a come back.

"I know...I'm just in shock that he would of kept this from me...us."

Hearing the obvious upset in her superiors voice, Riza's face softened as she went to sit on her own creaky bed. As much as Roy loved to tease Edward and complain about him, he did love the boy in a father like way. He was proud of all his staff, but Ed, he felt he had raised almost like a son since entering the military. He had been there longer than Ed's real father had been, he had proudly thought at one stage. Having realized just today that Ed had kept him in the dark over something so important, Riza knew he wouldn't admit it, but it hurt the General.

It also put a spanner in the works for getting Ed back into the military. Though that seemed to be far from the General's mind right now.

Riza stared at her superior then realized it just wasn't worth the fight.

"We will go to their home tomorrow, it must have been quite a shock for him to see us for Edward to leave so...abruptly."

"After three years it doesn't look like he really wants to see us though."

"And when has that stopped you before Roy?" Roy raised his head, back on good terms he guessed. He sat back up, straining his lower back slightly and winced. Rubbing his chin where some grizzle was forming from the three day train trip, he spoke thoughtfully, "That boy is hiding something."

Riza sat up a bit more formal. "You think Sir?"

"I know. And I'm going to find out tomorrow." With that last statement, without even kicking off his shoes, Roy lay down and curled away from Riza. He was way too tired to continue talking at this point.

Riza stared at his broad back for a moment, watching his breathe before lying down herself.

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She couldn't even get out of bed. After Ed had came back yesterday, she had barely been audible, in the midst of a flu. He had hated that she had to be alone for so long, but they needed supplies. It was early afternoon the next day by the time she seemed ready for food.

Ed stood paused before their slightly ajar bedroom door, a tray with some soup, bread, water and an assortment of pills in his hands. Sometimes it was just a little too hard to act normal around her. But he straightened himself and forcefully relaxed his face before entering the dimly lit room. The room was stuffy, far too warm for Ed's liking, but opening a window was not an option.

"Winry….? I brought you supper. Do you think you can eat today?" The body in the bed shifted over, turning towards Ed and blearily opening her eyes. She was pale, almost translucent. Her blonde hair looked dull, lacking the beautiful sheen she once had. Ed didn't think she could look paler than her white nightgown, but she did. Even with her looking this sick, she was still stunning to Ed. Like an injured angel.

Winry smiled weakly seeing her husband walk towards her bed. It felt like ages since she had seen him. He placed the tray down on the nightstand and sat down on the side of the bed, placing his hand on her thigh, squeezing it lightly. She looked at him fondly, placing her hand over his. God she felt cold, even in this sauna of a room.

"I'll try…" she said weakly, slowly trying to sit up with much effort. Ed quickly leaned forward and took the pillow from beside Winry and tucked it behind her back as she sat up. Letting his strong hands linger on both of her arms, he could feel just how thin she had gotten recently. He could clasp his whole hand around her bicep easily.

"Stop that."

"What?"

"That. I know what you're doing, I'm okay, really, just tired today." She looked at her husband and frowned, he clearly hadn't been looking after himself very well either judging from the scruffy ponytail, grizzle and crinkled clothing. "And quit staring Ed, I'm not gonna eat while you bore your eyes into me."

Realizing what he had been doing, he quickly looked away embarrassed. Dammit he was doing it again. Just act normal for once.

Winry went to pick up the tray, but with incredibly shaky arms, she could barely move it. Ed leaned over and grabbed it for her, placing the tray on her lap carefully and delicately. "You aren't supposed to lift things remember? Doctors orders."

Winry pulled a weak scowl at Ed, which only caused him to grin fondly. He had grown to love when she got mad at him. It meant she had some form of energy to be more like her old self. He shuffled over and sat beside her on the bed, resting his back onto the headboard.

"Now eat, gear head." Pointing down to the food like he was asking her to drop and give him 50.

She took the silver spoon in her hands and began to eat the soup. Ed wasn't an amazing cook, but it wasn't half bad considering he only started learning last year.

After a couple mouthfuls and a small chunk of bread she stopped. Feeling her stomach already full to the brim. Ed frowned "that's all today eh?" She nodded putting a hand over her mouth, making sure nothing was going to come back up.

Ed grabbed the water and handed her the colorful assortment of pills she was to take. With agonizing slowness she swallowed each pill individually. Once finished, Ed removed the tray and placed it on the floor beside him. He sat back, lifting his left arm inviting her to snuggle in.

Winry leaned in, placing her head on his broad chest as her husbands arm wrapped around her shoulders. He was warm which she relished. Her pills would kick in soon. It was hard not to fall asleep listening to the rhythm of his heart beat and the slow rise and fall of his chest.

"How is Finn? I haven't seen him today" She spoke weakly. Ed lay his cheek on the crown of her head, enjoying the sweet smell of her hair. "He's great Love. He's sleeping right now." Winry suddenly looked sullen. He seemed to be sleeping a lot during the day. "Is he still up with you at night? I told you to be stricter with him. He won't be able to function right if you keep this up."

"He's fine! It's not every night…"

He suddenly felt Winry stiffen, "You're messing up his routine again!" She pushed off Edwards chest. Glowering at him.

"W-wait calm down I just"

"Ed stop! You can't just let him get so tired and weak! I tried so hard to keep him healthy. I-I can't leave him knowing he's not being looked after prop-"

Now it was Eds turn to suddenly sit up, interrupting his wife's rant. He stiffened, and got out of the bed abruptly, swinging around to her, eyes flaring with old hurt.

" _Properly_?! Really Winry, do you have so little faith in me that I'd damage our son?! After all we've been through to keep him! Do you really think I'm not a good father?"

Of course she didn't, Ed thought. Not even his own mind thought he was. But it wasn't for lack of trying. It was just in his blood to be a bad father. He grimaced, looking away from her.

"I didn't mean that." Her voice coming out softer, weaker. "I'm just, I don't know. I don't want to leave him...knowing he's at all tired, hungry, scared or hurt…he has to stay perfect, stay happy. I'm not gonna be around to help you do that…" The last part causing her voice to break, Winry pulled her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and hiding her head.

Immediately Ed's anger changed to absolute despair. Trodding back over to his wife, he sat down and wrapped both of his arms around her. Encasing her in a protective embrace.

"I'm sorry." What else could he say? He was failing his wife's wishes, and in turn was failing their son. Her little sobs tore into Ed's heart like razor blades. Trying not to fall to pieces himself, he held her as tightly as he could without hurting her. Rubbing her back slowly until her sobbing stopped.

Eventually she unfurled, and he lay her down on the bed, pills taking their heavy effect, she dozed off. Placing a blanket over his wife, he then stood up and left the room.

Ed stood in the hallway, back against the wall. His long, tousled hair covering his face. He wiped his shirt sleeve across red eyes, trying to get rid of any tears that had formed. Damn he was tired.

Taking a deep breath in, then out, Edward took a step to trudge towards the bathroom. Suddenly hearing a small, sharp creek, his automail leg locked in place. ' _Fuck_ …' Frustration was beginning to boil just below his ribs, painfully circling his organs like dozens of trapped flies.

He swung his metal leg awkwardly forward, and hearing a loud ' _kachunk_ ', the knee loosened again. Ed began to rub his temples, feeling a migraine coming on. _'I don't need this, I don't need this, please just work for a little longer you stupid leg'_ he begged.

Hobbeling towards the bathroom once again, he stepped into the tiled, cold room. Stopping at the white sink, he ran the tap and splashed his face with cold water.

Catching himself in the mirror Ed couldn't help but realize just how wrecked he looked. Dark circles carved themselves under his eyes like marble. His face was grizzly with a weeks worth of growth, giving him a crazed looking expression. His hair was scruffy and his face was gaunt.

Taking his razor he began to get rid of any trace of a beard on his face. In hindsight he thought, it would have been better to lather up but he really couldn't be half assed. Immediately when trailing the razor down his cheek, it caught, slicing a small, cm long nick into his cheek. Sucking in air between his teeth, he hissed at the sting.

Quickly setting the razor down on the side of the sink, it slipped and fell to the ground with a ' _tak_!'.

Gripping the side of the sink til his knuckles went white, Ed considered smashing the mirror in, if only to vent his frustration, but leveled with himself that he did not want to wake his family. Breathing ragged breathes in and out, glaring at his own reflection, watching the small trail of blood flow down his cheek and drip to the floor, he waited til his vision stopped blurring with anger.

After about two minutes, Ed could finally look away, though still breathing hard.

He bent down to retrieve his razor when ' _KACHUNK_!' his knee locked once again.

"Oh fuck you, fuck you, FUCK YOU YOU _FUCKING_ PIECE OF SHIT LEG!"

Lifting his hip attached to his broken leg and pulling the entire limb backwards, he shot the leg forward in one fell swoop, smashing it against the porcelain bathtub.

Shards of metal shattered throughout the room, nuts and bolts, wires and valves as his shin came in contact with the tub. The sheer force of the kick caused the tub to crack and Ed to fall backwards onto the ground with a hard ' _thump_ '.

He lay there, eyes on the ceiling, panting hard.

Sitting up slowly, he viewed the carnage that he had just caused, catching his breath as he saw the mess he had just made.

' _Oh my god….I am so stupid.'_

Half way down his metal shin, was just gone. A single thick wire was holding onto his foot like a dangling fishing rod.

With no more anger left to vent, Ed hid his face in his hands. He fucked up. There was nothing more to say. He just fucked up.

After a couple minutes, he heard the bathroom door creek open.

A tiny, shocked breathe exhaled and he heard little feet stepping onto the cold tiles.

"Stop!" Ed swung his hand and placed his palm before Finn. "There's metal everywhere, don't come in in your bare feet Finn."

Ed looked at his son, whose face was far too stricken for a child his age.

The little boy held his hands up to his face, trying to hide his mouth. But his eyes revealed just how terrified he was at the site he just beheld, shivering and trying his hardest not to cry. Scrunching up his eyes , Finn took his right hand and clenched it into a little shaking fist and rubbed it across his chest in a circular motion.

' _Sorry_ …..'

Ed stared, arm still reaching towards his shock stricken son. Completely dumbfounded at what his son just signed him.

Suddenly gritting his teeth, he rolled up his slacks on his left leg, grabbed the docks on his thigh and released the remnants of his leg. Nerve pain shot through him like a bolt of lighting. Not letting the pain make him scream though, he got onto his one knee and scrambled over to the quivering child, embracing him frantically.

"Why are you saying sorry! I'm the one who has to say sorry Finn!" His voice coming out panicked and breaking. "Daddy just got a little mad is all, not at you, you're such a good boy, please don't be sad, please. Finn I'm so sorry." ' _No, please stop, please don't cry. Goddammit i'm such a monster.'_ Ed clasped the back of his son's head, feeling his little shoulders shake and heave as he silently cried.

"Sh shh shh, it's okay." Ed held his sons cherub like cheek and tried rubbing the child's glittering tears away. ' _This isn't allowed_.' "Hey, hey it's okay, I just broke my fake leg, it's okay see?"

Seeing his daddy smile a little more, if not looking a little panicky, Finns sobs became smaller and lead into little hiccups.

Ed gave Finn a small, quirky smile. "I know, wanna help me hunt down some treasure?" Finn's eyes perked up at the word treasure and nodded as Ed wiped his kid's nose with his shirt sleeve.

"Right!" Grabbing onto the door frames, and with quite a lot of effort, Ed wobbly got himself up onto his right leg, feeling a little breathless. "I need a wooden leg, pirates have those right?" Finn looked at him like this was very serious business and shook his head in a 'well duh' like fashion, red nosed and furrowing his brow, causing Ed to spit laughing at his sheer intensity.

"Okay, okay." He chuckled. "I need you to find my wooden leg down by mommy's work bench, can you do that? But careful, there might be sharks!"

With an official salut, Finn bravely turned tail and ran down the hallway towards the workshop. With that, Ed hopped towards the kitchen, hoping to find some treasure in the form of chocolate for his brave kid.


	3. Chapter 3

**/fG6VKm** **I drew fanart of my own story if you wanna look it's in the link TuT. I feel like not much happens here?! I dunno;n; I hope you like it anyway, I spent much longer on this because it was quite complicated for me to write being new to it and all. I wanted to make sure I got the right emotions across while still keeping in character and giving good information and maybe a small bit of comedy! Anyway ENJOY! 3**

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"Do it." She exclaimed, poking the small of his back with a sharp finger. Both soldiers stood at the bottom of the stairs to Winry's old and rickety house. Roy shot a glare back at Hawkeye, who was beginning to push him a little too far today.

"Do what Riza? Freak out at you? Because that's exactly what's going to happen if you poke me one more time." Riza's expression did not change, a determined, stoney face that would budge for no one. "Whatever works to get you to knock on that door Sir."

Roy scratched his head in exasperation, knowing he was just delaying the inevitable. He was so steadfast on getting to the bottom of Fullmetal's weird behavior last night. But as he stood in front of their house, Roy was suddenly not feeling up to the challenge. He sighed, if he was gonna back out, it was far past that time. Plus the occasional poke in the back didn't help from his ' _ever faithful'_ subordinate.

" _Fine,_ fine." Stepping up to the wooden door, he knocked two short knocks.

Hearing something shuffling inside he turned to Riza, who was also hearing the commotion.

" _Finn! Give me the leg, no don't answer the door first! Goddammit!"_

Roy raised his eyebrows, bemused by what he just heard. Suddenly he heard the screeching of a chair, then a clamber of chains by the door lock. _"H...how did you know the child locks Finn?! Come back here now!"_

Suddenly, the door creaked open and Mustang was received by the same intelligent, little golden eyes he had met in the shop yesterday. Apparently the boy hadn't forgotten him either, giving Roy a great big smile and flinging the door open with all his little might. Finn stood there smiling, then gave Roy and Riza what looked like a small, enthusiastic salute, but it was different, his thumb in front of his little palm. Roy could have sworn it was sign language, not a salute.

"Heya Finn" He responded, saluting him back, which only caused the boy to smile even wider. Then Finn signed him something else that seemed like a question, making a U shape with his thumb and finger on his breast. Roy immediately felt confused, Finn could obviously hear, but was he mute? He turned to Riza, who looked just as confused at the little signs. Grimacing at the wide eyed hopeful boy, he shamefully confessed, "Sorry lil guy, I don't know sign language." genuinely apologetic for it, now regretting not taking that class in academy.

The disappointment in Finn's eyes was hard to take, even if the boy immediately shook his head, putting on a small smile once again. It must be hard, knowing people can't understand you, Roy thought to himself ashamedly.

He knelt down to the kid's level, his back aching, trying not to whine like an old pensioner and pulled out a small trinket from his breast pocket. "Hey, mind getting your Dad for me? You can have another one of my medals if you want?" Roy dangled the little gold toy in front of Finn. An obviously plastic looking medal that he had purchased at an old toy shop in town. He wasn't willing to risk another one to Finn's alchemic experimenting. It's not like he cared for them personally, but he'd have Central up his ass for losing them. Finn looked at it, twitching his mouth back and forth, not playing the fool at all. The boy's golden eyes blankly met Roy's dark raven ones.

"He's mute. Not stupid. Unlike you, ya loud moron." A strained but old, familiar annoyance in the voice.

Roy looked past Finn and was greeted to the site of a dishevelled looking Ed, holding onto the hallway table, missing one leg and looking less than happy to see the two guests at his front door.

"That's a lovely way to greet your General after three years, Fullmetal. Where's the niceties?" His voice thick with a smarmy attitude and something Ed couldn't describe...anger? That thought caused Ed's neck hair to rise like heckles. ' _What right has he to start spouting his shitty attitude at me_?'

Roy stood up slowly, easing his joints back into a relatively proud looking stance. Ed had no right to be pissy at this stage, Roy felt immediately shitty with the unwelcome attitude he was receiving from his former subordinate.

"You're the one trying to bribe my son with toys you damn creep." Ed's words were laced with venom. His chest puffed out, even in obvious discomfort. The display could only be described as a protective parent, guarding his offspring as a predator lurked. The defensiveness in his demeanor was tenfold of what Roy had seen yesterday in the shop.

Using the table as a crutch to help him hop forward, Ed made his way to Finn. He placed his hand on his son's shoulder, ushering him off the chair. "Go to bed."

Finn wanted to protest, pulling a sad face and reaching his hand up to sign 'no!', but seeing how his father had acted earlier, and now this strict voice that was very unlike him, he quickly obeyed, taking a small look back as he went up the stairs. He was too interested in what the adults were so serious about. "Now Finn." Ed continued, catching his curious glance, causing Finn to flinch and scurry even faster. He'll just have to settle with sneaking down later.

Turning back to his former Boss, Ed's weary, stressed out eyes betrayed just how weak he felt. It was exhausting trying to act strong all the time. He was sick, tired and not in the mood for the faces greeting him. "Why didn't you warn me you were coming?" Ed's voice was filled with obvious vexation.

Roy blinked, this wasn't just a typical 'Ed tantrum' he was used to and would brush off. The young man was obviously strained. But so was Roy, and unlike the usual calm, rational General, the irritation was contagious.

"I don't know Fullmetal, I guess I stupidly believed you would have some sort of manners when it came to guests, especially friends you haven't even in _, oh three years_?..."

This got a reaction Roy was hoping for.

Grabbing a hold of the door frame, Ed hopped forward and took a chunk of Roy's shirt in his fist, squaring up almost nose to nose, which a few years ago, would of been nose to chest Roy thought indignantly. Flaring gold eyes met his pitch dark ones.

Ed practically spat, "What makes you think you can waltze up here and start demanding royal treatment eh? I didn't stop you coming here, you did! Just cause you're a fancy general now you shit faced bastard! You'll get none of that from me! I'm busy, I don't have time for your…"

A hand came down on top of Ed's. "Now now boys, you can quit trying to out alpha each other. It's embarrassing." Riza sounded calm, but her tight squeeze on Ed's hand gave away her serious stance. Nobody lays a hand on her General, even when he deserved it.

Ed reluctantly unlocked his eyes from Mustang's to face the new threat. Even with his aggressive stance, Riza could see their was pain behind Ed's eyes. Immediately her gaze softened and she squeezed the hand lightly that was still latched onto her General. Ed looked at her, confused over the sudden affection, causing his eyes to dart back and forth. The real emotion was hidden underneath, now coming forth through his glistening, golden orbs. Riza could now see a man full of desperate fear.

"Let go Edward" her voice was soft, like calming someone who held a gun to their head. " we're sorry for bothering you, we'll go if you want us to" She paused, her thumb rubbed the back of his hand soothingly, causing him to loosen and eventually let go. He held both arms back on the door frame, hanging his head so blonde bangs and shadows covered his eyes. Then in a small voice, Ed spoke to the ground.

"Why'd you have to leave it this long? You could have come home earlier…"

Roy's eyes widen ever so slightly. Staring at the obviously stricken young man he straightened and cleared his throat. Ed continued "I know, I know what you were doing was important, I would have been there if I could ha-"

"Ed...can we come in and sit down before we talk?" Roy interrupted the young man, aware of how standing on the one leg was difficult, seeing obvious shaking. A protective, parental feeling rose up in Roy's chest. Suddenly, Edward was fourteen again standing before him.

To that Ed leant aside, only a small hint of a gesture to come into his home.

As Roy was walking in, he bent down gingerly for the wooden leg, handing it back up to Ed causing him to blush in embarrassment.

Ed mumbled, which Roy ignored, continuing into the living room without him.

Ed had forgotten about the leg in the moment. Sitting down on the little chair, he attached the leg as best he could. It was like a slot for his stump more than anything, only momentum would make the knee joint move. 'How archaic' he thought, standing up and swinging into a small stride to follow his two guests.

When Ed had entered the living room come kitchen, both of his guests were already sitting on his couch, alert to his presence. He scratched the back of his head, limping towards the sofa opposite and sitting down hard onto the many assorted colorful cushions Winry obsessively collected. Trying to sound a little less irritated, Ed lay his head on the back of the couch. "Make yourself comfortable I guess…" he waved his hand towards the kitchen flatly. "Foods in the fridge, if you want something to drink I got nothing but water or tea. Want something stronger, go get it. There's a guest bedroom down the hall you can take if you're staying." He sat there staring at the ceiling, avoiding as much eye contact as he could. His nonchalant body attitude not convincing anyone that he wasn't bursting with anxiety.

"Thank you Edward." Riza exclaimed. "But we've obviously caught you at a bad time, we'll stay in the hotel. We don't want to intrude."

"A-alright." Ed sat forward, rubbing the back of his neck.

To that, Roy stared at the young man across the coffee table. "But we will take you up on the offer. Intruding is what I do best apparently." He smirked, catching Ed's eye. A slight relief formed on the boys face, his shoulders relaxing from the taught position they'd been in for hours. He shrugged "Whatever's easiest, I don't care."

Riza smiled at her General. Reading people was his forte.

She stood up, "I'll make some tea." and with that she made her way to the kitchen area.

Ed sat there, not saying anything, content with just fiddling with his sleeve while waiting for Riza to return. Roy knew Ed. He bottled up his problems, his guilt and shames. ' _Perhaps he's just ashamed of being a father so young? He would've been 19 when Winry got pregnant, that's very young for a child...but how could you be ashamed of that child? No, by how Ed looks at Finn, there's nothing but pride there. Perhaps his depression was still looming...'_ They sat in silence for a couple minutes. Roy kept his eyes on Ed, concern billowing in his chest.

Finally he took the initiative to speak. "He's great, Ed, your son. He's really great, you should be proud. That boy is one smart toddler." Ed looked up, a lightness in his expression arrived that just wasn't there before. Suddenly, Ed became full of life, making large gestures like giving a lecture.

"Isn't he?! Finn's incredibly smart, too smart for the other kids. He beats them at everything! Even though he can't speak, he's leagues above everyone else's kids. He's even fascinated by automail! Always helping Winry in her studio. Yeah." The ends enthusiasm dissipated, causing Ed's sad eyes to return and look away.

If it wasn't for the last part, Roy would of been convinced he was talking to Maes. He swallowed the bittersweet feeling. The enthusiasm for one's own child from these men was heartwarming.

"Is Winry down in her studio Edward? I'd love to see her it's been far too long." Riza spoke as she brought over a teapot and three mugs. She had found it hard to find clean utensils.

Ed stiffened obviously at this question. Which caused Riza to pause as she was pouring the first cup.

"Uh, s-she's not feeling well at the moment, Winry has the flu so she's been bed bound for the last few days." Roy watched him closely. The pain was back full force in Ed's eyes. He was wringing his hands, as if he didn't know what to do with them.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." She continued pouring the teas. "Could I possibly say hello later?" She sat down beside Roy, holding the warm cup in her hands. The house was cold.

"Mm, I'll see how she feels... _Finn,_ I thought I told you to go to bed?" Both Roy and Riza had not noticed the small boy in the hall, half hidden by a coat rack. Finn jumped at the sound of his name. _But the hiding place was so good?_ And then stepped forward, bravely facing whatever dangers lay outside the duffle coat cave.

Roy couldn't help but chuckle at the mini Ed striding over proudly towards the couch to sit by his father. Finn's eyes were just as firey and full of passion as his father's used to be. But right now there was nothing but strain in them.

"You really don't take me seriously do you?" Ed stated, grabbing the little boys sides and hoisting him onto his lap. In hindsight he shouldn't have done that so harshly. His port stung from the severe thrashing earlier.

Finn shook his head, a cheeky smile widened on his face, then he turned to the man sitting opposite. Again, Finn put his right hand up to his chest in the shape of a 'U' questionably.

"Still don't know sign language!" Roy shrugged. "I'll learn it and come back to you Finn. Promise."

At that statement, Roy could see Ed stare at him. "That better not be a lie."

"I wouldn't lie about that." Roy stated, his voice as sure and steady as ever. By the way Ed relaxed back into his seat, he looked satisfied with that answer.

"He's asking you about a medal, by the way." Ed looked questionably at Roy.

"Oh, he took one of my medals yesterday, and transmuted it into a...wrench. Honestly I'm not even mad, that's incredible for a child his age." Finn puffed out his chest. Proud of his handy work, he took the little golden wrench out of his jumper pocket and displayed it proudly for all to see. Ed's eyes widened. "Finn I _told_ you you weren't supposed to do alchemy outside the house! Ugh, why bother anymore…" he hung his head, while Finn patted his daddy's cheek, almost in a comforting 'Sorry, this isn't gonna change so deal with it' way. Ed was a father who is already exhausted by his toddlers rebellious streak. Sometimes he wished Finn had inherited more of Al's demure nature.

Riza smiled from behind her cup at the dejected Edward. This caused Roy to snort, quite unkempt of him, but he couldn't help it. This was too funny. Ed scowled. "What's so funny you had to ugly laugh like that?"

Roy rested his chin on his hands and leant forward. "Finally, it's refreshing to see you go through dealing with a rebellious child. Welcome to what my world has been with you. It only gets worse as they get older, trust me." He continued grinning quietly, fingers covering his smirk.

Ed huffed, suddenly a teenager again. "I'm still not done with torturing you, that'll never end."

Roy smiled more genuinely this time. "It's good to see you again Ed, really. If I'd have known about Finn I would have at least tried stay in contact..." he looked down, a small pang of guilt crossing his face that did not go unnoticed. "We were always doing something, there wasn't a day without hard labor or tense meetings. We've all suffered for it, but it was the right thing to do, I know it. I'm sorry at all if you had to suffer for that too." Roy subconsciously rubbed the large battle scar on his leg that caused the most pain.

Riza stared at him, concern rested on her face for her commander. It was true, everyone in his team found the work exhausting, almost impossible at times, but Roy had suffered the most. Her General had done more than anyone else, pushing himself through all hours, in all weather. Even when told to stop by the very people he was helping, he refused. In the end, the debilitating work had caused more damage to his body. Arthritic pains were now a constant reminder of his struggles, and the scars that bore deep into his muscles were like burning daggers when inflamed. Still, he pressed on, and continues to do so even now. Riza and his men had nothing but pride for this man, and even broken down, he was still their leader.

Riza looked up at Edward. His face as he held his son, playing in his arms, was laced with confusion. Almost like he was battling between being angry, or being genuinely touched by what Roy had said. " 'is fine" He said quietly. Blushing.

Roy interrupted his train of thought. Not wanting to upset Edward anymore, he changed the subject.

"How come Finn doesn't use a transmutation circle?"

Ed looked at Roy, then Finn and shifted uncomfortably. "H-he was born like that. I figured because I've seen the Truth...he must have inherited it off me."

Roy's eyes widened ' _Was that possible?'_ He supposed it could be. There's been no studies of children of people who've seen the Truth. "Fascinating…" Roy contemplated this, eyes flicking back and forth. ' _Though this also stinks of a lie'._ He wasn't about to pursue it any further though, for now. He felt on thin ice with Edward, it was best to get into this slowly. He nodded, settling for the answer given to him.

Finn was slightly confused over the adults talk. Twiddling with the little wrench in his hands, he gave out a massive, silent yawn. "Okay, this time I'm bringing you and you're staying in bed." To this Finn gave a little nod. His brain wanted to stay up, but his three year old little body couldn't take anymore lack of sleep today.

Ed stood up with the boy in his arms, but almost fell back down due to the unsteady leg. It wobbled underneath him, straining with the unbalance Finn was giving him.

"Here, I'll take him." Riza put out her arms to take Finn. After a small bit of hesitation, Ed admitted defeat and handed his son over. "I'm just not used this stupid leg yet, it's not nearly as good as automail, but mines...broken. One minute. Riza his rooms down the hall on the right." This had reminded him and he limped towards the bathroom, leaving Roy alone.


	4. Chapter 4

**Whoah long chapter! Guess it makes up for it being a few weeks. Please leave a review I would be very greatful:D**

"I couldn't help myself…" stopping mid blow at cooling down his tea, Roy looked up, turning around to see Riza standing by the doorway, her shoulders tensed and her mouth pulled taught, a rare site that he's only witnessed a couple times during their turbulent relationship. Roy's brow knitted together at the site of his second looking so distraught.

"What-couldn't you help?" He asked slowly. His question forming a lump in his throat and the atmosphere becoming a little too panicked for his liking.

Before she responded, Riza made her way stiffly and quickly to sit down by her General, causing him to lean backwards slightly at her intensity. Hawkeye wasn't one for physical closeness, which surprised Roy all the more when their thighs touched. Her worried blue eyes gazed intently down at her lap as she leant in to whisper, a layer of guilt crossing her normally stoic face.

In response, Roy copied her movement and leant in closer, just a couple inches from her pale face, awaiting to hear what troubled her. With much effort and just a small, almost undetectable break in her voice she began "...I checked in on Winry, I know I wasn't supposed to but, her door was slightly open and- god, she's sick, she's really sick. I think she's dying Roy..." Riza rubbed her palms on her face, leaving them their to cover what could of been the start of tears.

Roy's eyes widened at her sudden woeful description. "Whoa whoa wait, how do you know that from just looking at her?" He took her wrists gently and pulled them down onto his lap preventing her from hiding. She never needed to hide.

His hands encased hers and he shuffled a bit closer, looking like two teenagers discussing secrets. Riza couldn't be this upset over nothing, but...

"I didn't at first, I just saw she was asleep, then I saw the bottles and bottles of painkillers, antibiotics, morphine Roy." She met his gaze, eyes glistening with intense sadness, his name rang from her mouth as if it was breaking. "Then, I saw the oxygen tanks, used and new. I know I shouldn't have gone snooping but I just needed to know I-she looked so desperately thin Sir" Riza paused, breathing in and centering herself once more.

Not much could shake this women, but seeing her friend like she just did, Roy couldn't help the urge to squeeze her hands tighter in his. He would've adored to do more, put his arms around her, but reigned in the urge, as usual. "I don't think we can judge until we get the full picture." He turned to look towards the hallway and began to stand up, releasing Riza from his grip. "Where are you going?" Riza's voice was steadier but still thick with sorrow. She looked up at her superior officer, who's face was now blank and his black eyes set determinedly on his destination.

"To find out what the hell is going on here." And with that statement, he went to go find Ed.

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Ed was still on the floor picking up the many shards of metal that littered the bathroom when Roy decided to show himself. He leant against the door frame casually folding his arms, watching his former subordinate ungainly leaning on his right leg, compensating for his lack of a decent left. From behind Roy could see the boy looked desperately thin in his hunched position. His spine poked up from his white shirt like little snow tops. A feeling of concern and guilt washed over him briefly. Leaving Ed had been alright, right? He didn't know now. It pained Roy to know that he had left Ed to grow up faster than he should have once again. The boy had had no childhood to speak of, no chance to be a teenager, and now no time to be a young adult without a care. He was perpetually older than he needed to be. Forever looking after someone else. And now this with Winry? Roy realized he was going to have to go about this delicately.

"What exploded in here?" (Okay maybe not that delicately) Roy smirked, taking on a lighter tone as to not startle his former subordinate, who looked entranced with picking tiny metal slivers out of the bathroom tiles. This sadly, did not work and caused Ed to jump out of his skin and whack his head on the bottom of the bathroom sink.

'Oof!' Ed yelped. The loud smack off porcelain releasing a clanking noise that echoed in the bathtub. His arms instinctively wrapped around the back of his blonde locks and he turned to face the cause of his misery, who so happened to have slightly stepped back around the door. A morbid scowl formed on the young blonde's face as he turned slowly. The phrase 'if looks could kill' briefly flew through Mustang's mind.

"Fucking hell Mustang…!" His voice coming out like a strained whisper.

"Sorry, not funny?" Roy hesitantly jokes. "I would've presumed the sink was too tall for your head to hit it."

Ed's scowl deepened forming small lines on his already exhausted face. His expression only conveying 'Really? You wanna do this now?'.

"No…" the word was thick with bitterness. Ed rubbed his head wincing as the stinging pain brought about by his dumbass of a former boss radiated into a headache. Sure he could yell, blast the guy out of the small bathroom, but what would it accomplish except another worried cry from his son. The young father seemed too tired to bother. Almost. Turning away he bit his lip in frustrated defeat and continued silently picking up the microscopic pieces.

Roy frowned at the back of Ed's head. The lack of fire in his very being was deeply disturbing. He would of been sure a short joke would of worked, although not too accurate anymore to Roy's dismay.

Hesitantly he risked asking, "Can I help?" as the older alchemist began to bend down slowly onto the bathroom floor beside Ed before he could answer. Ed eyed him suspiciously and Roy glanced over, noticing immediately the lack of trust flaring in his golden eyes. Something had broken between them these last few years and he wasn't sure it could be fixed easily.

"Sure…" It was all Ed could really say, suddenly feeling shy about the close proximity. He wasn't about to make the older man stand again when it took all the effort in the world to kneel. Mustang still had the air of a powerful leader, even more so than before he had left. But he was definitely weaker physically. Mustang held himself well, but from the small stress lines and the occasional grimace, Ed could tell he struggled.

The dark haired man began to dig into the tiles, picking up any stray piece that he could see. Taking special care to get everything he could find. Ed definitely didn't want this sticking into his three year olds feet.

A couple minutes were spent in silence, the only noise being the shuffling of knees and the occasional grunt from either of the banjaxed men.

"Jeez Ed, is this your leg? D-did it actually explode?" Roy deciphered, picking up a metal toe that had spun its way across the floor and behind the toilet. He could see the rush of blood flying up Edward's face as he snatched the small metal digit out of the Generals hand.

"It's none of your business you old geezer! It just broke…"

"...into a thousand pieces…"

"Y-yeah."

"By itself…"

"Not by itself...the bathtub helped." Ed gestured towards the large, angry crack in the porcelain tub. Roy rolled his eyes, so Ed's anger issues hadn't really gone from having a kid.

He let out a deep sigh as he bundled up all the fragments he could find into a neat pile. All the while noticing Ed side eyeing him. At this point Roy was getting sick of the awkward silences between them.

"If you have something to say Fullmetal then say it." But all this did was conjure up another wince and flush from the young man. Roy's jaw tensed. He could of happily grabbed the blondes shoulders and shook him til he admitted what the hell was going on around here. Instead, he took a more gentler approach. Placing his hand over Ed's shoulder, he turned the young man to face him. The boys eyes widens at the sudden contact, almost afraid as they looked at the older mans dark eyes.

"Ed. Things...aren't good around here are they? it's clear to see somethings wrong. I know it's been awhile, but I'm here if you need to talk. Please just let me know so I can help you." The sympathy and care he felt for his young prodigy rang through his voice. And Ed could feel it.

Something inside Edward stirred as he met the General's eyes. There was an almost longing sensation for the supporting, paternal, deep voice of the man sitting beside him on the floor. All his soul was screaming at him to do was curl up on that man's lap and cry his guts out til he had nothing left. A basic instinct that urged him to at least, start talking. "You'll hate me…" a small voice that sounded like his fourteen year old self emerged.

"After all you've done Ed I don't think that's possible anymore." Roy was trying to sound light but he saw the young man flinched in reply. 'Don't say stupid things Roy, not right now when he's just about to open up.'

With a shaky breath, Ed got up off the floor using the sink as leverage, fake leg squeaking in protest. "Not here." Was all Ed needed to say as he limped out of the bathroom and back down the hallway. Roy pursued him, knowing Ed probably didn't want to wake anyone with what he was about to say. Instead of going into the living room like Roy predicted, Edward opened the front door and lurched out onto the porch. Passing by, Riza eyed Roy from the couch. Unspoken words between them as he past by gave Riza all the answer she needed to leave them be. Though she would naturally listen in.

When Roy made his way out, he saw Ed had already settled on the veranda. Fake leg stretched out awkwardly, human leg bent to support his elbow that in turn supported his chin. He stared out over the farmland, dusk starting to stretch across the sky turning everything orange. A slight breeze ruffled his blonde locks as his head bowed down to the incoming wind.

Roy joined him, but consciously gave the guy a little space between them. There was a moment spent appreciating the surroundings, their shadows becoming stronger as the sun started to set. Roy grinned grimly inside at the pathetic fallacy that this was.

"I'm such a selfish man…"

Roy raised his eyebrow at the sudden declaration coming from Edward. But he dare not say anything in fear of him stopping. He just sat there and listened once more. Ed's voice was numb as he stared not really at anything. "I did this to them. I ruined my sons voice. I made Winry sick, I'm the one who f-fucked up everything." His voice began to crack as he bit down hard on his lip to prevent any more stutters.

His head hung towards his chest as he grabbed his fringe roughly. Roy finally saw Ed for the broken man he'd become.

"Ed…" Roy scooted closer, his hand poised to touch the young lads shivering arms. Though his attempt at affection was rejected by the his wincing retreat. "Don't!...don't try comfort me Bastard, I'm not the one who needs it." Roy knew this was the biggest lie out of his mouth, but obeyed. He wasn't about to push Ed away any further by being too forward.

Ed took a deep breathe and continued. "He was only one, Finn, when he got sick…"

Xxxxxx

" _I'm so sorry, but there's nothing more we can do. I can only make him comfortable…_ "

 _"BULLSHIT!" Ed interrupted Doctor Wren for the tenth time that meeting, slamming his fist down on the Doctors desk. "There's always something you can do! You're just not fucking trying hard enough! Is it money you want? Fine take it all you greedy shit bag just-just don't say there's nothing!"_

 _"Mr. Elric, I know this is not good news but may I remind you there are patients next door who need sleep. Please. I know this is hard, but we have to keep a level head." Doctor Wren adjusted his tie and shuffled his papers. He was clearly nervous of the ex military man standing over his desk with murderous eyes._

 _"Keep a level head?" Edwards flaring eyes bored into the good Doctors. "You tell me my son is dying, and you ask me to calm down!?" His grip on the table was so hard it turned his knuckles white._

 _"Ed! Please!" The only other person who was suffering just as much if not more than Edward spoke up. Winry was at breaking point by now, months and months of not knowing why their son was deteriorating before her eyes. Now finally hearing the conclusion, she was spent. Her rough hands covered her delicate face as she shrunk back into the chair. Her woeful screech immediately made Ed sit back down. That was a noise so desperate that all he could do was go silent. He couldn't even look his wife in the eyes. Let alone comfort her. 'Useless' would be Ed's word of choice for his husbandry._

 _"Can we take him home?" Winry spoke up to Ed's surprise. Sounding more steady than he had all of the meeting. Her eyes set determinedly on the Doctor._

 _"I think it would be best."_

 _The meeting went on a bit longer and then they were allowed to take Finn back home. Ed held his small bundle in his arms, holding the little boy as firmly as he safely could as they walked back up to the house. His tiny, skinny frame was far from that of a one year olds. Finn still only looked about 4 months old. His little face was scrunched from being in pain._

 _Finn's little blonde wisps of hair tickled Edward's chin as they walked. And every time they did, more tears welled up in Ed's eyes. The smell of his kid, that sweet baby scent that only he would recognize, caused daggers in his chest every time it wafted upwards. At that point he was constantly swallowing lumps that would not leave his throat. Growing like the inoperable tumors his child bore. His family didn't need him to cry, not right now he thought._

 _The next couple days where spent quietly lumbering around the house. They barely spoke for days. At Least not either of them._

 _Edward got up early that morning, it wasn't like he had slept anyway, to feed Finn what little food he could handle. Holding the small boy upright in his arms, he sat drearily at the kitchen table, spoon at the ready._

 _"Come on Finn, just a little for Daddy? It's tasty." He paused the spoon at Finn's mouth. Finn was getting fussier and fussier, probably linking any food to pain when eaten. He shook his head and clamped his mouth shut. Pushing away the spoon so hard that it fell with a loud clank on the floor._

 _"Mno Dada!"_

 _Edward's entire body went numb. 'Oh god'... 'oh no please not now.'_

 _Edward looked down at his boy who was clearly wondering why his Daddy looks so shocked. He hesitantly asked again, "Finn? Do you want more food?"_

 _"No Dada" which caused a little smile to form on the sickly boys face. Clearly proud of mastering his first words. Then slowly his expression changed to confusion, confusion over why his Daddy was now crying while looking at him._

 _'No…' Ed thought, a dull ache rising in his chest . 'No, no. Why did he have to speak. Why does my son have to learn to talk when he won't be able to continue talking. This isn't goddamn fair.'_

 _He stared down at his sons beautiful golden eyes. Finn smiled up weakly and clasped onto his father's braid, suddenly entranced by the blonde locks. He sat there in comfortable silence as Finn babbled, and occasionally attempted a couple more 'Dada's'. Closing his eyes he listened to his sons ramblings. Cherishing every sound he made, trying to commit it to his memory._

 _He didn't tell Winry about it before things deteriorated._

 _Ed woke with a start from his sitting position on the couch, still holding a book on the merits of alchemy in art. Judging from the sheer black outside the windows, it was easily around 3am. He hadn't been sure what woke him until he heard it again. "ED!" The terrified shout of Winry came echoing through the hall from upstairs and he was on his feet and on his way at lighting speed._

 _Almost falling to his feet he slid to a stop at Finns bedroom door to see Winry kneeling on the floor, the small bundle of blankets and their son in her arms. "H-he's not breathing Ed! He's not breathing I can't get him to breathe!" Her screams rattled as she patted desperately at the little boy in her arms._

 _Ed grabbed the boy out of her hands, her arms still stretching as he took her son from her. Saying nothing he laid Finn down on the ground and placed his ear to his sons tiny chest. No heartbeat. He began CPR, pressing as firm as he could on the child's sternum without damaging him. After every couple pumps, he placed his mouth over the boys and flooded his lungs with air. 'I thought he still had time, he still had a bit longer.'_

 _Winry knelt on the ground, silent except for her hyperventilating gasps, eyes locked on her child._

 _After thirty minutes of attempted resuscitation, Ed stopped._

 _His head was fuzzy, eyes unfocused and black spots dotted his vision. Everything felt like it was underwater. His wife's sobbing as she crawled over to the little body was muted to his ears._

 _'I'm not doing this...I'm not ruining everything again.'_

 _Ed got up and left the room, walking downstairs into the basement in a daze. Autopilot was now in control of his body and mind. There was nothing to it anymore, no debating, no decisions, no shitty morals. His son didn't deserve to leave this world, but he sure as hell did. This was an easy decision, no doubt about it._

 _He returned upstairs with chalk. The body of his son was still laid out on the floor, half in his mother's arms. Pale and unmoving like a porcelain doll. All colour from his tiny cherub lips now replaced with a greyish blue._

 _"Winry…" she looked up to see Ed standing over her, stained marks down her face. Hehad never seen such agony and it killed him to say the next part. He took Finn out of her arms and lay him gently on the floor._

 _"Go down stairs."_

 _She looked at him as if he had three heads. "What?"_

 _"Please.."_

 _Winry was about to protest when he took her by the waist and picked her up. "What are you doing?! Get off of me Ed!" She pounded on his chest but he wouldn't let go. He placed her outside the room, blocking her way back into their son. "Just stay here then! Winry please. I'm sorry. It's going to be okay."_

 _"Ed what are you-" her eyes widened in realization and she increased her frenzy to shove her way back into the room. Ed blocked her path with strong arms. Steadfast in his decision._

 _"Ed don't, stop this right now! Don't do what you're thinking!" Her frantic pounding on his chest did nothing to stop him._

 _"I'm sorry Winry, I love you." And with that, he pushed her back into the cold hallway and slammed the door shut. There was a flash of light around the edges as he sealed the lock. Winry didn't take much time to recover and continued her desperate cries pounding so hard on the door she cut skin on her knuckles. Suddenly she turned heel, sprinting down towards her work shop to grab her screwdriver. She was fast, fast at dismantling, she just hoped she was fast enough to dismantle the door._

 _It killed Ed to leave her pounding so desperately at the door. But he knew this was the only way. The only way things could turn, because he couldn't live with himself if he didn't try._

 _Ed took the chalk and began the complicated and intricate etchings that made up a human transmutation circle. He needed to keep his hands steady, constantly trying to quell the panic and pounding heartbeat in his ears. His son lay stiffly in the center of the circle. So delicate and lifeless._

 _After checking over it a good dozen times, Ed spent no more time thinking about it. Placing both his human and metal hand down on the circle it began to light up. Sparks flew up and danced like electric bolts into the air. A gust of wind, a force so strong it almost knocked Ed backwards began to blow. He held his palms down as hard as he could, awaiting the white light to form around him._

 _The last thing he saw was Winry grabbing a hold of his shoulder._

 _"Edward Elric...we meet again." Truth stood opposite him in the white landscape that was the Gate. His smile shining so brightly it could be mistaken for friendly by someone else. No, there was nothing good behind that twisted smile._

 _Then he noticed something. His son, was in Truths arms._

 _Immediately he began to cross over, take his boy out of that demons sick embrace. "Ah, ah , ah." Truth shook his index finger and tutted. "You want your spawn back? What do you have in exchange?" As if Truth needed to ask, but playing with Ed was a pleasure he didn't get nearly often enough._

 _"You know what I'm offering. Just take me instead, please." Truth enjoyed a good bargain, and if it's one thing they wanted, it was Edwards soul. But they had all eternity to get it, and now was not the time. No, Truth had something better in mind._

" _I think, I'll take something else. What about her?" Ed was confused by the way Truth pointed behind him. Until he looked._

 _Winry stood there in the white barren. Looking just as confused and scared as Ed felt. She stared at Truth, noticing Finn in their arms._

 _Her instincts kicked in and she ran towards him, snatching the baby out of Truths arms. Truth had made no protest in letting her take him._

 _"Isn't that sweet?" He toyed as Winry ran back over to Ed. She wouldn't look him in the eyes. "Winry what are you doing here?!" Ed's voice shook violently as he knew how much danger she was in. Winry ignored her husband, choosing to face Truth, her voice steadfast._

 _"What do you want for my son?" She clung onto Finn tightly, hiding her own terror and trying to prevent her shaking arms from jostling her child._

 _"Half of everything you have, plus one thing from your son." Truths face construed as his smile widened, vicious fangs grinned at the small family._

 _"Bullshit Truth, you know you've wanted me, why not just take me now?!" Ed stood in front of his family, blocking Truths gaze._

 _"It's either that or go on your way and I take your son. Pretty good deal if I do say so myself Edward Elric."_

 _Ed turned to Winry, and she finally looked up at him. Azure eyes wet and filled with determination. Edward knew that look, it was the same one he'd given her when he wouldn't change his mind. He pulled her into an embrace careful of their sons body by her chest. Grabbing her golden locks in his hands, he shoved his face against her shoulder. "Don't…please. You don't deserve this punishment, I do. We can find another way to bargain."_

 _"It's too late Ed." She took his chin delicately in her hands, forcing him to look into her deep blue eyes. "It's my turn to save us." She smiled, calm and determined. She stood up on her toes and kissed Edward's lips softly. It had been awhile since they had shown affection for each other, and Ed caught himself not wanting to let go. Winry broke it off, kissing his chin and then pushing by to stand in front._

 _"It's a deal." Her voice rang throughout the ever expanding white landscape. Truths smile turned into a laugh so stifling Ed instinctively went to step in front of Winry. But before he could, she was being swept forward by an invisible force. The force knocked her breathless, almost losing her grip on the child in her arms. Then suddenly and explosion of pain entered her body. Every organ in her body was being cut in two, blood drained from her nose, her mouth, her ears. Globules floated towards Truth as he consumed her. Ed screamed her name as he tried to run towards her, but the same force was keeping him back._

 _Once Truth was done, she began to fall. Edward was finally free to run to her, catching her before she hit the ground. Ed fell hard onto his tailbone but had kept his family from slamming into the white floor. He brushed away the sweat and blood soaked hair from her unconscious face, but relieved to find she was breathing. Immediately he checked Finn, still pale and unmoving._

 _Eyes flared angrily at the grinning ghost. "I thought you said this would bring him back! That was the deal Truth!"_

 _Truth just giggled in amusement. "There's still one last thing to take." Suddenly Finn's mouth opened, a tiny white light emanated from his throat. It formed a small glowing sphere as it floated out past his delicate lips and into the mouth of Truth._

 _"No Dada!" Truth mimicked his son's voice perfectly, amused by Edwards stricken face. "I thought you'd like to hear it one last time. Because you won't ever again. Now begone with you Edward Elric. Til next time you want to play!"_

 _Edward wrapped his arms around his small family, encasing them as the white world around them shattered back into their known reality._

 _He held both Winry and their son in the middle of the circle, not moving until he knew they were on solid ground again._

 _The next few days where spent in the emergency room. Winry had suffered so much blood loss the doctors were surprised she was even alive when Ed had burst in carrying her and his child. As for Finn, it was counted as a miracle. The tumors had disappeared and he was on his way to being a perfectly healthy little boy._

 _xxxxxxxxxxx_

 _"_ Winry has just kept deteriorating since...the doctor has told me she doesn't have long left. And she told me if I was to try anything stupid with her, she'd never forgive me. I doubt Truth would even let me. They'd probably come up with an even more twisted deal…"

Roy sat back, staring silently at the blonde man beside him. The tale he had just listened to chilled him to his very core. Suddenly Edward looked a lot older than his twenty three years.

Ed was scared to meet Mustangs gaze. Afraid of the judgement he might see. Would see. He knew he was despicable for playing with life. He knew he was a disgusting pers-

Roy grabbed Ed by the shoulders and viciously embraced him, pushing the blondes head into his chest and wrapping his strong arms around him to encapsulate the boy in his protective hug. A small whine left Edwards mouth smothers against Roy's chest.

"I'm so sorry Ed, I'm so sorry you dealt with this alone for three fucking years. Oh god I'm so sorry I didn't check on you, I thought you'd be okay, I knew something was off but I was stupid enough to just brush it off. I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Roy continued his apologies as he clung hard digging his fingers into the boys back. Suddenly Roy felt Ed's back begin to heave. Dry sounding sobs emminated from the young man in his arms.

They spent a long while holding onto each other, then an even longer time chatting about different things, this and that. Riza decided she had heard enough and left them to reminisce.


End file.
